Knowing when a cat is a bit of a “Greta Garbo”

At least, where other cats are concerned.

The handsome tom that began visiting us at the beginning of the year is just such a cat. He popped to see me sporadically at first, and then the visits became more and more regular, until he was either trying to sneak into the garden and take up residence on a bed, or popping in like clockwork for his meals twice a day.
After a couple of months with almost scheduled appearances, I managed to catch this boy – who I had dubbed Mim for reasons far too long winded to explain – and get him neutered and chipped to me. The change in his behaviour (after a four day absence; while he presumably weighed up whether or not he hated me for putting him through such an ordeal) was remarkable.
Mim went from a nervous, skittish cat around me to one that actively initiated affection. Before I put food down, he’d nuzzle my hand. This progressed to actually getting on my knee for a cuddle.
The sticking point was the fact that no matter what I tried, he wasn’t at ease with more than two of The Mob being present in the garden with us. He’d accept fuss graciously; in fact he was quite insistent fuss was administered. But if one of the other cats came too close in proximity he’d hiss or growl. (Understandably, The Mob weren’t impressed by a newcomer ticking them off for approaching their human.) If he was settled in a bed, and more than two of the cats followed me out, his body would tense and despite his act of being asleep, one eye would open sporadically so he could check he was still comfortable with how close the other cats were to him. I realised that regardless of my rather strong attachment (it’s natural you’d form a strong bond with a cat you’re teaching to trust again) Mim would never be truly happy as a permanent member of The Mob. Sharing was not something he was comfortable with, and he’d made that perfectly clear without any real show of aggression.

I reconciled myself to the fact that I would have to find him a home he was content in; and it wasn’t mine.
During the time I had been trust building with Mim, I regularly visited a friend who lives locally to me. I’d spoken to her about Mim on a number of occasions, and although she loves cats she and her partner had held off taking one on for their own reasons. I figured her meeting him would be nice, seeing as I had gabbled on about him so frequently, so asked if she’d like to come and sit in the garden and have a cool drink with me one day.
When Mim came into the garden, the connection I saw between him and my friend was remarkable. It was pretty much instantaneous. I know if time hadn’t been put in ensuring he was calmer around people this probably wouldn’t have happened. But it did; and it was wonderful. Things moved pretty quickly from that point, because my friend – who was totally besotted from initial meeting – came and sat in my garden every day for the following few days; and she and her partner set about making their home “cat friendly.” Within a week, Mim was settled in a new home, safe in the knowledge he was loved.

Although I miss Mim sitting with me in the garden while I drink a cup of tea, I know I did what was right for all the feline personalities concerned. Within days of Mim no longer being in the garden, my cats all reverted back to their normal behaviour too…and Mim? Well, let’s just say being an only child suits him much more.

Mim king of his castle

        Mim, king of his own castle….